i might get shin splints

being accustomed as i am to flouting demand
of course all myself tenses accordingly to the order
in your name, my hackles raised and teeth show baringly
rage; of course in need i am reduced to the starving creature
that night in the rain on your stairs with my useless jacket
umbrella unoffered to your bedraggled head for fear– for terror,
yes, you suck the bravery from my lips with your black eyes

i shake for longing
i shudder for want– your hands so far away still curved
to the shape of my hips and i can see it– don’t tell me that’s natural,
don’t say seeing things (how can you see things unless they are there?

tell me)
all pride hung over my shoulder to dry from the storm of your silence
having wet me through to bone showing clear against my clothes,
a heart pounding with pleas–

hold me, hold me, hold me

but you stay with your stoniness and i with my loneliness, yes,
of course,

on opposite planes standing back to front here we are
and i am obedient when it serves me so yes, yes,
i will heed your name and its orders after all
(oh please my legs my heart
don’t fail me in this pursuit)

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