fucking retarded, yeah

i am a stupid fool for the boy
and his tricks, his twisting paths
of words through knotted crevices
of my brain and the tortured pussy
he ravages with his rough hands
his rough nails, an idiot

for torn skin and green-tinged bruises
littering my shoulders with epaulets
as symbols of our wars,

a dumbass for his bad rap
and clever lyricists, for raunchy jokes
and rancid flesh and trembling spine
and broken skin on my collarbone,
my hipbone,
that patch of skin between my arm
and underneath

an ass for his ass slick with sweat
under my nails and quivering with coming
and coming and coming, going crazy
for the tenderness of his lips
and darting tongue,

a raving fucking lunatic alive
with the electricity of his touch
and lassitude, his languid laughter,
his dark-eyed long-lashed let-me glare
over my shoulder in the blue glow of tv screens
and predawn sky

i am a jackass (of hyperbolic proportions)
for the slap-stung starving stasis between
leaving for work and working on me,
working on us,
fighting my demons, crushing my walls,
breaking my will to his whip and the wilderness
of his bed unwinding every snarl and whorl and
tangle of my psyche–

a sucker for his lopsided alien grin,
his twitchy fingers and that luxurious fucking sweep
of spine and hipbones like baby bird wings furled
and that old-tree complexion and oh oh oh
stupid, baby
i’m stupid for you, knot me in ropes
of spineless boyflesh
and keep me for good,
yeah?

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